With The Waves
by Autumn Win-Dow
Summary: She exhaled before looking straight ahead at the horizon – of which, like her biggest wish, was something virtually impossible to reach.


**_With the Waves_**

**By Autumn Win-Dow**

(AoGA House Cup. Words: 1095)

* * *

As she slowly walked towards the smooth, white sand of the beach, she was hit by a gush of strong, salty wind. However, she didn't mind the slight stinging in her eyes or the dishevelling of her usually neat black hair, as she stepped out of her sandals right before placing a foot onto the sand.

The closer she approached the rocky waves, the stronger the wind became. Hotaru could feel a grain of sand – of which had been carried by the wind – land in the corner of her eye, but as she was unwilling to use her hands to wipe it away, her eye started to become watery. Even then, she didn't use her hands – instead making an attempt in blinking both her tear and the grain of sand away.

Hotaru didn't want to use her hands because of what she was holding at that moment. Her pale, petite hands gripped the neck and the body of a seaweed green bottle made of glass, which was plugged with a worn out cork. She held the bottle so tight that her knuckles started to turn white, and her arms started to tremble. The dark haired woman did not want to let go of the bottle at all costs – she kept the glass object near her chest for good measure.

She halted in her steps as soon as she reached the section of the beach where the waves moved back into the sea. As soon as she stepped on to the moist sand, it sent a cold sensation through the soles of her feet. Paired with the increasingly chilly wind, it almost made the Ice Queen shiver.

Hotaru's arrival at the beach was in fact something she hadn't expected to occur until that very day. She had planned to spend the day as normal – planning and working on a new invention, as well as consuming a healthy dose of crab feet for lunch – but when she woke up that morning, she felt empty. The fact that she had isolated herself from everyone – even her best friend Mikan – ever since _that day_ was starting to change her thoughts. Usually, she would talk to Mikan and the rest of her friends about her new inventions, projects, as well as the smaller things occurring in her lifetime. Even if she didn't want to, she opened up to her friends – of whom were always there for her – and afterwards, Hotaru would always feel as if a weight had been lifted off of her shoulders.

However, ever since she had pushed her friends out of her life rather ungraciously, she was starting to regret it.

Hotaru felt dejected. Silent.

Alone.

She hated her past self for being so stubborn and self-sufficient, and when she had truly realised how important her friendships were, they had disappeared from her life. It was even more heartbreaking for her to admit that it was her fault.

_But it is._

She deeply exhaled before looking straight ahead at the horizon – of which, like her biggest wish, was something that was impossible to reach. Her thumb unconsciously stroked the soft surface of the bottle's cork, and the index finger of her other hand tapped the smooth glass surface of the bottle.

The bottle was what remained after Hotaru indulged heavily in alcohol in her home, alone. It was one of many scattered around the fresh white carpet of her house's living room, since she had completely lost her rational sense _that night_, and had carelessly thrown the glass bottles in random directions.

It was the very first and last night she had drank alcohol so plentifully. Hotaru vowed not to indulge so heavily ever again, even though at times, she was close to giving in.

As she inhaled a deep breath, she could smell the faint hint of alcohol from the glass bottle, and she wrinkled her nose in distaste. Hotaru started to regret not rinsing out the bottle before sliding in her message to _him._

She didn't know why she suddenly wrote the message she had slipped into the beer bottle.

Hotaru had never held any interest in such sentimental things – including messages within bottles, intended to forge a bond between the sender and the eventual recipient, halfway around the world – but she simply wanted someone to know about how she was doing. The fact that she had lost contact with her best friends had deeply saddened her, and in the end she had resorted to telling _him _about what was occurring in her life.

She missed Ruka Nogi, and his all but busy ears – in fact, he was one of the people who often pressured her to tell him about her day, which was something she secretly enjoyed. The image of his silky blonde hair and his aquamarine eyes was ingrained in her mind every day. No matter how many times she tried, she couldn't forget him.

Ruka had never betrayed Hotaru, except for _that day._

Hotaru finally submerged her feet in the water, and released one of her hands' grips on the bottle. Holding the glass contained by its neck, she raised it over her head, ready to toss it into the sea. However, she paused in her movement, a split second before she was about to throw her message.

She was initially confused as to why she had hesitated. _It's only a damn bottle. What am I doing?_

All of a sudden, a hot tear emerged from the corner of her eye- but this time, she knew that it wasn't the air of the beach making her eyes watery. The more she thought of Ruka, the more she wanted to break down. The hand which held the bottle up high trembled as she grit her teeth.

She couldn't bear it, even if it had been a month since _that day. _Hotaru sharply exhaled, before using all of her might in throwing the bottle into the ocean. The green piece of glass spun in the air multiple times before breaking the surface of the water, and being caught into the rhythm of the waves.

The man she had loved all this time had disappeared from her life, because of a tragic car accident.

Ruka had left her, straight after intoxicating her with the never seen before feeling, and he had left her clinging onto an empty hope that somehow, her message would get to him.

* * *

_Ruka,_

_You're probably not going to be pleased about this information, but I drank ten bottles of liquor last Tuesday._

_Hotaru._

* * *

**_A/N: Sorry if it isn't coherent. But I hope you like it!... somehow._**


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